BULLSHIT

Just had lunch. Well, I dunno if you could call it lunch but I had a pandesal I got earlier from 7-11. It was supposed to be for my last break but I thought I’d eat it anyway. And I did. I have 30 minutes more left of my lunch break so im writing this post.

Somebdoy in the office named Jeremy just gave me a key chain with an image of Mother Mary. I was thankful of course. He gave several others the same thing. Maybe he did not know that I am not a catholic nor do I go to church. Nonetheless, I was grateful. That was sweet of him.

Can’t wait for later. I am getting my 15th day salary. I wonder how much I will get.

Mama called yesterday but apparently I wasn’t home yet. My brother, John-john told me that my ever so evil (pardon for the tem, couldn’t help it) grandma was asking her for the money we owe her. And we haven’t got anything. And it is causing a lot of trouble back home. Mom and dad are fighting because of this.

So I immediately borrowed my cousin’s phone, inserted my sim and then called mom up. I was answered by someone who I thought was mom crying. I was surprised and I immediately asked why she was sobbing. Turned out it was my sister who answered the phone and that she wasn’t crying at all. Active listening. Ahehehehe… another mark down if I were at work.

I talked to my mom for like 30 minutes about why grandma was asking her money when in fact its them (their side including her other children) who owes us money. I still remember when mom got a maturity loan like three years ago worth 100,000 pesos. The money wa ssupposed to be spent for a computer for me and other school needs. But they borrowed the money and until now, they haven’t returned a single cent. They have forgotten about it and now they’re like asking us for the money we owe them? BULLSHIT!

Well mom, being the ever so nice and God-fearing woman that she is, just wouldn’t fight back. She told me, Huwag na anak. Bahala na ang Diyos sa kanila. (Don’t worry about it son. Just let God do the judging.) I found it very unfair. How can they insult us like this when in fact it is us who should be doing this to them. I just don’t see the point. I told her that if this happens again, she’d have to call me. I’ll make the move. She insisted her point.

For as long as I can remember, they always looked at us differently from the rest of her grandchildren and family members. Remember when I wrote about an instance where we were having dinner and then grandma told me Ikaw lang ang Fainsan na ganyan. Nakakahiya ka. (You are a shame to this family) This was because of my several peircings on my face and my being gay I guess had something to do with that. I told ger in return, Hayaan mo, pagnakagraduate na ako, magpapapalit ako ng apelyido. Gagawin ko na Fortaleza. (Don’t worry. When I graduate I would change my last name to Fortaleza*) Then I hurriedly went to my room, locked the door and read something.

There was time too when every month we get sacks of rice from dad’s part in the land my grandpa owned. Then came a day when we haven’t received anything. It turned out, they sold dad’s part so their youngest daughter could put up a house in Cavite. We didn’t care. We let it go. Then we knew that our house was a collateral in some transaction grandma did.

Bullshit right? And we weren’t suppose to say anything with regards to that. Not even slap it to my granma’s face which I was so wanting to do during the call with my mom. But I pity grandma. She is losing everything now. Karma is what I would like to call it.

Of course, at the end of the day, I don’t want to see any of my family members, and its extension, losing everything. But if they keep doing this to us, especially my mom, they’ll have to deal with me.

* Fortaleza – Mom’s maiden name which is also my middle name