Friday, November 26, 2004

MY LIFE IN SHIT

Seems like the heavens and everything is is conspiring to make me miserable. I have been feeling shit because of the failure I had with my job and earlier something really bad happened, again.

Last night I was already here in the office for my 4Am shift, right? It has become a habit to sleep here whenever I have an early morning shift or when my shift ends late in the night.

I WAS LATE!!! for two hours to be exact. I didn't wake up on time. I relied on my phone alarm but somehow I turned it off when it went off. I was awaked by a noisy crowd entering the lounge area and the next thing I knew, fuck! it was already 6 in the morning. I was so panicky. I wanted to send an SMS to my supervisor but I left his number in my notes which was in the locker in the next building. I even decided not to go to work anymore earlier, to just go home and cry and rant at how miserable my life is right now. But I pushed myself to go nonetheless. I would tell my supervisor the truth. I overslept, the next thing to being fired from work.

Fortunately my supervisor was not mad or anything. He just told me to buddy up with somebody, Patrick was his name, for the rest of my shift and that he'll refer me to another supervisor coz his shift was almost over. I was really apologetic. It was my fault. Who else could it be?

With that the next supervisor told me that I was gonna be on half-day which means half-pay for the day. I said it was alright and that it was really my fault. But I still worked six hours with a one 15-minute break and an hour break for lunch. Went straight to Up come 1PM and met up with my orgmates. Somehow, I was relieved to see familiar faces, again. The ones I was with in college. I was, for a moment, back to my happy-go-lucky self, making jokes and funny remarks.

But deep inside I am very disappointed with myself. How could I let this happen? I thought I have the skills, the confidence (slight), and the brains to pull this off. But I thought wrong.

This makes me really really really sad... :(

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