A JOB, FINALLY

Finally, I have a job. I am now a call service representative at E-Telecare. I signed a 6-month contract with them yesterday after passing the five-day commnuication skills training. I am gonna start Tuesday next week. I’m so excited already. Can’t wait for my first salary. Haha.

Yesterday, was like the most heart-pounding day of my life. I had to deal with three interviews that basically gauged my ability and communication skills. It was like a test to see whether the five-day training did me any good or not.

After everyone was done with the interview, we were like so scared. I personally was already resigned to the idea of not passing the final interview since I thought I did not do well in it.

When one of the trainers entered the room with a piece of paper on her hand, my heart just went to the roof. I was really nervous. Then she called some people to transfer to another room. After the last person exited the door, she told us that everyone left in the room passed the interview and would be signing a contract at the end of the day. I cried with happiness. I thought of my mom and how happy she was gonna be when she finds out about it. MJ and Jen, my nff* also cried with me. We were just so happy. But of course we felt sorry for those who didn’t pass. The class was already bonded. But it was expected. Right in the beginning of the training we were told that not all of us would be offered the coveted contract.

So after the contract signing, we went to the canteen and ordered ourselves bottle of beers to celebrate along with those who did not pass. We had so much fun talking about each other, first impressions, cruches, love, being gay and straight, etc. I went home really tipsy with Jen. I also spent the night at her place.

Earlier today, Jen and I watched White Chicks at SM North Edsa. The movie was fun. And when we were about to exit the moviehouse, Rommel, our co-trainee, called me from behind. Hahaha. What a coincidence!

Hayyy… Life has really its way of agreeing with you. I just hope it goes my way always.

*nff – new found friend (courtesy of MJ)

FIRST DAY ON THE TRAINING | First Salary Too...

First day on the training and I came in late. I was with a friend, Jen, who lives near me so I met her ealier so we could to the training together. The traffic was so bad that we spent almost an hour going there. And to make matters worse, the shuttle that was suppose to take us to the building for free weren’t showing up when we got there. We asked a lot of security guards where the shuttle was and they were directing us to different locations. And then we saw a sign “Free shuttle ride here” and underneath the sign was written, “Shuttle ride unavailable.” We haven’t got any clue where the building was though we had a map given to us during the contrat signing. So we took a cab and asked the driver to drive us to the said location. And to our surprise, the place was like two blocks away from where we were. Haha. The taxi meter did not even charge us a cent. So we paid for the starting fee of twenty five pesos. Of course I added five pesos for the trouble w’ve caused the driver. Haha.

So the first day was great. We took up pronounciations and stuff. And since I am in a confidentiality contract, I cannot divulge any information reagarding the training. So I’m not gonna give you full details. But rest assured, it was fun and exciting. I already can’t wait for tomorrow.

Jen and I also made a new friend who also came in late. Much later than us actually. Her name is MJ, this 25-year old who doesn’t look her age (she looks younger, like 21) cool girl who is living with his 19-year old boyfriend in her apartment in Pasig. She smokes too so everytime we got a chance to light up our cigarettes, we would always go out of the building and smoke together and make funny remarks about our co-trainees and stuff.

The ice-breakers definitely broke the ice, if you get my drift. Haha.. I really enjoyed the training. Towards the end of the day we were grouped and ecah group had to give out suggestions on improving our communication skills. Every group gave out pretty much the same suggestions except what I gave. I said, “try looking for an American boyfriend or girlfriend.” This defintely sent everyone to laughters and one trainor even said it was a good idea. Hahaha… I am becoming infamous for my humor amongst my co-applicants. I just hope laughters and jokes doesn’t affect my performance in the training coz this will tell if I am gonna proceed to the next training or not.

We were also given our allowance for the day after the training. Haha… Gotta buy me more business casual clothes.

ALL THIS ATTENTION

God, people can be so horny. All they tend to think about is seeing me naked. Hahaha... And I am your ultimate tease.

The pictures I have posted at fotki.com sent my popularity among PLUs to the roof. I even got this guy I have been crushing on from connexion.org for so long. And he definitely looks good and tastes good in person. He fetched me up at SM North Edsa last night with his Ford Lynx (is that right?).

I have been chatting fot the past couple of days and the attention! Hahaha.. I am loving it. Gotta post some new ones soon - more bold, daring and yummy. Hahaha.

I might even prepare myself a schedule to accomodate all these gorgeous yummy guys! Being single has never been this fun!

***

Anyways, enough of that sex-craved brew. I am gonna start the training at E-Telecare tomorrow morning from 9-6PM for five days. I hope I pass that. If I ever do, I will again undergo another training for almost a month. Hayyy... I don't really feel excited but hey, gotta get through with it for the money! And so may mom won't keep pestering me anymore about being jobless. Hahaha...

Better get back to chatroom. A lot of guys are waiting. See ya!

OF BREAK-UPS and STUFF

I was talking to a friend, who also just came from a break-up, last night over the phone and I thought I would hook him up with my ex but he thought I was just being bitter about the break-up. I let out a loud laugh. Why would I be acrid? It was me who ended the realtionship in the first place? And besides, I think I am happier now that I am back to singlehood. I am officially back to the market, and up for grabs. Hahaha…

I asked him why he broke up with his bf of less than one month. Apparently, he got bored with the relationship. He got tired of it. So a day before their first month anniversary, he decided to call it off with his beau. How rude right? I mean, breaking up with somebody the day before your anniversary? I couldn’t imagine myself doing that. And he lied about the reason he ended the relationship. What he told him was that his mom found out about them and that a break-up is inevitable. At least I had the guts to break-up for the real reason rather than cloud it in some pathetic guise, right?

It’s been two days since the break-up and I am like a prime rib on the market. Hahaha… The phone never stops ringing even during wee hours which irritates my cousin who was here last night with his mom. When I got home yesterday night from a café, coz I couldn’t use the computer at home because my brothers are playing Ragnarok Online, I saw the phone in my room. I thought to myself, it’s my cousin who put it there because a lot of guys are calling me during the night with their low, husky, and horny-as-hell voice. Haha…
My cousin and his mom left for Pangasinan this morning and I am hoping they’ll stay out long this time. I dunno, I just ain’t confortable with them here in the house. Actually, the truth is, they own this house. Hahaha… So I can’t really do anything about it.

***

I posted some naughty pictures at Fotki.com yesterday. Hahaha... Now you can see Brew naked. I dunno if you'll like it or not. They are meant for those who are just so horny they can't get enough of me. Lol.

OFFICIALLY SINGLE Part II

So I spent the night with my EX boyfriend. We had a small talk about why the relationship had to end. Basically, it was all me, my fault, my decision. He couldn't do anything about it. But I think he has already come into terms about the break-up. We are okay, friends, maybe just like what we are meant to be. We even had, and to quote Gloria Macapagal Arroyo, "plenty of sex" last night and this morning.

He also accompanied me last night at this alley in Recto to buy porn videos. 3 for 100. Pretty cheap huh? hehehe... Took all the guts I had just to approach manong vendor who was selling the VCDs. Hahaha...

When I woke up the next morning, still on his bed, he was chatting with some guys. Talk about moving on. I never realize breaking up was this easy. I even joined him while he was talking to a couple of guys and girls. Hahaha... And guess what we did on cam for the www to see? Hmmm... Use your imagination dearie.

***

It's mama's birthday today. Happy birthday Mama! I love you so much! Mwah!

OFFICIALLY SINGLE... again

Hayy.. It was so hard saying those words. Breaking up is definitely hard to do, maybe the hardest thing I ever did. I just could not stand a guy crying over me. It's just so... so.. so new. The feeling sucks but I guess I had to go through with it. It just ain't working for me anymore. I am selfish, I know. But you can't blame me. Or can you?

H&K has done nothing wrong. If there's someone to blame it's me. I dunno. It's just me. I can't stay long in something, well, basically anything. Be it work or otherwise. Guys, for me, as of now are like games. They end and when they do, somebody always loses.

But I wouldn't say that h&k got to the losing end. I want to still be friends with him. You know, for old times sake. I feel we could get along just fine. I am here with him at this cafe in Recto. He is uploading something for his Tita. We are talking at YM. I am even gonna spend the night with him.

We broke up over the phone and somehow I think we still have to talk about it. I still love him though.

I am gonna write more about it tomorrow.

CONFUSED

I got admitted to E-Telecare, a call center in Eastwood, and they wanted me to attend this 5-day training to polish my confidence coz mmy lack of it affects how I speak. That'll start next Monday. But they also told me that there's no guarantee that after the training I'll be given the job. With the training comes exams and evaluations if I am really capable of the job.

Adrienne, a girl I met there who was also applying got the same training as me. But she wasn't too happy about it. She thinks it's rejection guised as a training. She thinks we ain't good enough for the company that's why we have to undergo this polishing. This got me thinking. I am not being too pessimist but I think she has a point. Now, she's having second thoughts of pursuing the application. She still wants to continue her studies. She only has six units left, and that's her thesis.

I persuaded her to at least give the training a shot and if she doesn't like it she could leave. I just hope I convinced her.

Now, I am thinking if I really want to pursue a call center career. A lot of my friends say that there's no growth in this career and stuff like that. Though it's good money, you'll sacrifice a lot. My night life especially, since the job is gonna be mostly in graveyard shift. And there ain't no fixed schedule either. The shifts are rotating and we even have to go work on holidays including Christmas.

Oh well, If ever I pass the training and not be terminated along the process, I'll have to stay with the company for six months or else I'll pay the bond which costs Php 30,000. Hayy... I am so confused right now.


***

My friend Howie is gonna be gone for quite sometime so I am gonna wish him the best. Whatever it is that you are gonna fix, good luck! Be back soon, aight!

ONE GOOD DAY COMING UP

The fast few days have been so busy for me. Last Wednesday I was in Star City with my bf and his friends from PLM (Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila). That was my first time and we tried almost all the rides from bump boats to roller costers. It was nerve-wrecking. There was this ride called zyclone (something) and it was one helluva panicky ride. I was frightened after a few seconds of it. I think it was almost about a 3-storey building in terms of height. And midway through the ride, it made a 360 degrees turn, vertically. I couldn’t even scream. I just closed my eyes and held the handle bars real tight. After that ride I swore never to try it again. The haunted house and the other supposedly scary places ain’t scary after all. I just laughed at the mediocracy of the effects. But all in all the experience was great. I got to hang out with my bf and his friends whom were really great and good to me.

After that, we got a few drinks which left H&K dizzy and almost puking. We slept at one of his friends’ house and I left the next morning for an interview at Eastwood.

The interview went well. I passed the exam and I got a final interview come Tuesday. I just hope this turns out good. I am reallt excited about it, though call center ain’t really my priorities anymore. But hey, it’s still work and I need it, err… the money. Haha.

The next day, which was Friday, we (bf) went to Bulacan to his friend’s house. we spent the night there and went swimming the next morning (which was just earlier) at some lake just behind the house where we stayed. It was fun and his friends were so good to me. Went home around 2PM.

HE HAD ME AT HELLO | Reminiscing

The night is silent and cold. Like a ghost behind my back, memories of the past haunts me and send me into a form of nostalgia. I am transported back to a time when I felt happy and contented for the first time in my life. It was a time of extreme bliss. It was the time I met him.

He was the guy I was dreaming of for so long, someone I could finally love and be committed with. And I was, for almost three months.

I felt like Julia Roberts when I met him at Friendzy.com. And he definitely had me at hello. He used to flatter me with his messages telling me how funny my pictures were, that I was his stress-reliever at work, and that he was falling in love with me. I wanted to believe him and I did.

The first rendezvous was perfect. I met him outside his office then we had breakfast at McDonalds. I remember telling myself how I lucky I was to have met this guy. He was almost an embodiment of perfection: smart, handsome, stable and he loved/s me.

Right after breakfast we went to his place, an almost two-hour trip from his office. He introduced me to his grandma, a sweet old lady. While I sat on the sofa, smoking, he told me he was the one who designed their house. He was a graduate of architecture from UST, one of my many options before.

We would steal kisses from each other every time his grandma was out of sight. Libido was obviously rising up like a volcano about to erupt when he led me to their library. He showed me his computer and some of his cute pictures.

Then he kissed me. I kissed back and it started there. We made history inside that library. Finally it wasn’t just sex. It was making love, for the first time.

But that is all over now. He decided to be alone and I let him. A huge mistake but I have to accept it, sooner or later. We ended up not in good terms with each other. I feel he hated me. I still can’t figure out the reason. But I know he hated me for something I did. Another history was made and that I can’t change.

And now all I can do is stare at his picture in my study table, while I contemplate about life, could-haves, should-haves, would-haves and the likes.

JOB FAIR IN MALACANANG

Bumming around is taking its toll on me. After five months of doing nothing productive, my mom’s perspective of course, she is now forcing me to find a job. Two days ago, she called me up and told me about a job fair in Malacanang. Apparently, the President opened up a call center job fair where supposedly, 20,000 Filipinos will be given a chance to try their luck in a call center career. Mom heard it on the radio. So she immediately gave me a call and compelled me to try it out.

I said yes halfheartedly. I wasn’t really planning to go there for a couple of reasons. First, I don’t know the place and second, I don’t wanna go alone. Later than night, same day, she called me up again, reminding me of the job fair the next day. She asked me to be there around four in the morning so I could line up early. Duh!? As in? That early? I didn’t fight wit her on that anymore. If I am gonna drag my butt in the fair, I’d leave the house around 7AM.

I texted Joan if she was in Manila so she could accompany me but I got no reply so I texted H&K instead who were in Cavite that night for his friend’s debut. He said he’d catch me up in that fair not later than 10AM. He had to travel back to Manila early in the morning.

So I wasn’t really decided yet if I was going or not and I hate to break mom’s heart again. Before I slept that night, which was around 3AM, I readied my stuff like resumes and pictures. I saved my resume in a floppy disk so I could get it printed before I go to the fair the following day.

I arrived in the fair around 8AM all sweaty and shit from all that walking and asking around. Like I said, I ain’t familiar with that place. When I entered the gate of Malacanang, this security guard who was trying to be funny, I think, asked me where I was going with a straight face, as if I had a bomb on me. I immediately and calmly said I was on the way to the fair. Then with a sudden change of mood, he told me if I had already combed my hair. I let out a big nyehhh…. He was so feeling close. Haha… But it didn’t bother me. At least he would remember me for something – my hair.

I fell in line with the other applicants to get the registration form, which was life forever. When I was near my turn, I remembered I had no pen. So I immediately texted my bf to buy a pen on his way there. Good thing he arrived soon, with a pen of course.

I filled up the form and returned it and they gave me a stub of some sort, which I wasn’t sure what the purpose what. After that, we left the place to print out some more resumes.

We got back and everyone was lining up these booths. I lined up, filled out some forms for the companies, got interviewed by some of them, and then had an appointment for an interview with Convergys in 45 minutes. So my bf and I went to McDonalds to eat lunch and when I got back to the booth of Convergys, they told me I was already called but I wasn’t there. They told me to look for my resume in the huge stack of resumes. I wonder how many of then will actually pass the exams and the interviews. I saw mine right away because I used a different paper for my resume, which was pretty distinct. It was whiter and it had a texture. I was interviewed right away by this guy who I thought was cute when I saw him earlier. But when I came face to face with him, I figured he ain’t that cute, just kinda. After a couple of questions, I told him I already took the exams in their company, did my final interview and that JobsDB, this recruitment agency I was with that sent me to Convergys before, told me I was supposed to be on training already but that I hadn’t received any call from Convergys about it. He told me he’ll look into it and that he’d call me after it was settled. We shook hands and off I went to the next booth, the last one.

This particular booth had so many people lining up in front of it. And considering the sun was almost kissing our asses, people kept on coming. I got a brochure from the company and I checked it out. It had an email address where applicants could send their applications form to so I figured why line up with these people who were becoming sweaty and smelly when I could opt for the convenience of the Internet. So I looked for my bf and off we went.

We watched Raising Helen at SM Manila after, had a coffee and then went straight to our own houses. He hadn’t slept yet since the party last night so I decided he should go home and take a rest. And I was so tired too from that job fair so I went straight home.

F, HERE I COME

Last night I tried to make a website for my resume, portfolio and other stuff. Like a one-stop, sorta kit for job-hunting, a site where employers/companies can go check my resume. But that will have to be put on hold. I finished the resume part but I was having a hard time deciding what to put on the portfolio part. It may take some time.

Later, after this post, I will be making an application letter to F of Studio 23. I am planning to apply as a writer/researcher there. Imagine a life of glamour and spotlight. Of course I’m gonna be staying behind the camera but hey, it’s always good to rub elbows with the rich and famous. Or maybe just the famous. Hahaha…

I am also planning to check out MYX and other programs of Studio 23 like Breakfast, etc. I am gonna email them my resume, sample of my works and the URL of my website. That would be one great publicity for my website, wouldn’t it? Ahehe…

Maybe I will also try other TV Stations like GMA, RPN 9 and ABC 5. I have seen some good programs from the latter two stations.

I just hope my cousin go home to Pangasinan this week so companies can call me through the landline. The phone here stopped ringing ever since Ragnarok became popular. And the five-hour maintenance of the game every Wednesday ain’t sufficient for me. Argh! Fuck that game! Even my brothers are so addicted to it.

OKTOBERFEST NA!

San Miguel Oktoberfests are being held everywhere lately. Just last night there was one at SM North Edsa parking lot, which is just like 10 minutes away from here. I could have easily hailed a bus and walahhh! I would have been celebrating with a lot of drunkards and basag-ulo’s last night.

I remember the first and only time I went in one of those Oktoberfests. That was just last year when it was celebrated at SM Megamall (rumor has it that this mall is the third largest in Asia). I was with Ibs and his orgmates (organization mates). The organization had a booth set-up, which sold beer and foods, etc. The first few hours were okay. I was actually having fun just watching the people drinking beer after beer, looking for gorgeous guys and selling the items that we had. And since we were so far away from the stage where live bands were playing rock music and stuff, we didn’t see a thing.

Then the night went deeper and the crowd was becoming bigger. Bigger that it was hard to move around especially when you are going to the portable comfort rooms. We had to endure a lot of bad-smelling, sweaty, noisy, drunk people on our way out the place just to relieve ourselves at Seattle’s Best.

We had this girl who would I say pretty. She had this pretty small dress on with her boobs almost peeping out and greeting every costumer we had. And I think she liked the attention so we just let her do her stuff. Good enough, we sold so many beers because of her. But the downside was, there were so many guys, old and young, ugly and gorgeous, out side our booth asking for her name, number and other demographics. Haha… this made the other members agitated because they, including me, thought these drunkards were harassing her. But she was so fine with it (the harassment) that we eventually gave in.

The people inside the booth became more agitated as the night grew deeper. The supposedly happy festivity was slowly becoming a disaster for all of us. And Ibs was growing so disconcerted. So the group decided to pack up and go home. Since we borrowed some ice buckets from the management (who was so lame at managing the crowd), Ibs and I went to the side of the stage to return it and get my ID, which we left lieu in of the ice buckets. But these big, muscled, sorta-bouncer guys wouldn’t let us near the stage. We tried to enter the barricade they have made around the stage but we couldn’t get it. We tried to ask for someone who we could talk to but these bouncers didn’t know anything. It was like they were all muscles and no brain. Not even a little. I was keeping my cool coz Ibs was nearing explosion. And you would not want to see Ibs explode. God, she can be so scary. Though deep inside I was really worried because if I couldn’t claim my school ID, I couldn’t enter libraries, and might not even take the finals, which were in the same month. And Ibs knew that.

After several attempts looking for someone who actually knew stuff, I told Ibs to just bring home the buckets and claim my ID the following day. He wasn’t as keen to the idea as I am but hey, we didn’t have any choice that moment.

We were about to leave the place when out of nowhere, somebody called my name. Haha! Am I lucky or what! It was Michelle, a classmate I had in PE (Philippine Games). And she was inside the barricade. I asked her what she was doing there and it turned out her boyfriend is the lead vocal of the band playing. So a big smile came upon my face and I told her about our dilemma. She hurriedly looked fro someone (management) and poof! She got my ID back and they got their ice buckets.

After that I was hoping Ibs would be lifted from his maelstrom of agitation and anxiety. But he wasn’t. Then the first cab driver asked for an additional fee because, according to him, our destination was so far, which made Ibs even more frantic. We got out of the cab and looked for another one. Fortunately we found one immediately.

As we were riding the cab I tried to make Ibs smile, you know, just to relieve the tension that was building up, you could cut even pinch it.

Okay lang yun. Tawa naman dyan. (It is okay. Just smile for me, would you?)
Please stop! Please, it’s not you. It’s me okay!

And I was thrown aback. The rest of the ride home was silent and the tension was blowing up faster than the cab itself.

When we got home Ibs said sorry. And I took it. I shouldn’t blame him really. The circumstances called for him to act like that. I understand him. Though I so wanted to scream and act the way he did when we were behind the stage, I kept my cool and acted like it was okay. It wasn’t really okay. I never lost a school ID before coz I know it would take months to process and get another one. And the finals were coming and teachers usually asked examiners for IDs.
You see, the things I went through because of that Oktoberfest (OctoberPEST I should say). So last night wasn’t really a why-did-I-miss-it thing. I had more fun doing my laundry, watching TV and listening to FM.

CAB DRIVERS' BULLSHIT!

CLEVER CAB DRIVERS
1:21AM
07 OCTOBER 2004

Talk about clever cab drivers. Just last Wednesday, after having coffee and watching A Sharks’s Tale (which was really really funny and Christina Aguilera was there) we decided to go to his place so I can rest and he could start with his assignments. You see, the night before, I didn’t have enough sleep. And we met at around 10:30AM, minutes after the mall opened.

So we hailed the first cab. When H&K told him the address we were heading to, the driver declined. Said there was a heavy traffic in that area. Which was like a big crap. That’s why we were taking a cab rather than a jeepney because cabs can roam every street to avoid traffic. I bet the real reason he declined was because of the address. San Juan, Tondo, Manila. Tondo is known for criminals and such. Well, a lot of Filipino movies featured the place as that. I would say even I would be afraid to go to that place. Just hearing its name brings up bad thoughts.

And then we hailed the second one. Same excuse.

Then the third one. Fortunately (rather unfortunately as you would see later on) he agreed to take us to the address. We were relieved and happy. Finally we could just sit back and go home with ease and comfort. I had a small talk with the driver as I usually do, especially when I ride alone, so I would feel comfortable. Then after a few minutes, the driver said something in a low voice. We asked what it was and he repeated it in the same manner. We still didn’t get it so we asked again.

250 na ha! Traffic kasi eh. (Pay me 250 bucks coz there’s a heavy traffic in that area)
What!? Manong naman. Wala po kaming perang ganun kalaki. (We don’t have enough money.)
Kanina ko pa sinasabi, kala ko narinig nyo na ako. (I have been telling you early on about this.)
Di naming narinig. Baba na lang po kami sa tabi. (We didn’t hear anything. We’ll just get off here.)

But unfortunately we were already in a flyover and the traffic was pretty bad. Then we looked at the taxi-meter and it wasn’t running.

Baba nyo na lang kami manong pagbaba ng tulay. Wala pala kayong metro. (Just drop us off after this flyover. You ain’t have a meter running.)
Napasubo na tayo sa traffic eh. Cge kahit dalawang daan na lang. (We are already in a heavy traffic. Okay, I’ll settle for 200 bucks.)
Nyeh! Wala pa nga pong isangdaan ang binabayad naming pag umuuwi kami eh. Baba nyo na lang kami manong paglampas nitong tulay. (Huh!? We usually pay less than a hundred when we take a cab going home. Just drop us off after the flyover, okay.)

After the flyover he stopped the vehicle in one corner. H&K was so irritated that he got off the cab as soon as it stopped. The driver asked for the flag-down rate of 25 bucks as a fee, for the trouble. I asked H&K for 25 bucks but he only left me 20 bucks. My money was all bills and in hundreds so I just gave the driver the 20 bucks.

Kulang ito. (This is not enough.)
Aba manong, buti
nga binayaran
pa naming kayo. Pwede naming kayong ireklamo kasi di kayo
nagmemetro. (You
should be happy we even paid you something. We could
notify the authorities
about you not using the taxi-meter.)

And I slapped the door as hard as I could. It was already raining when we got out of the cab. We stayed for a while at a waiting shed and after smoking a stick, I told him we should move on. The rain hasn’t stopped a bit but I insisted and then we ran to the nearest covered area, walked, went down an underpass then hailed a jeepney. Then we finally got home and H&K was still irritated when he remembers that taxi driver. I also got his plate number. Stored it in my phone so if ever something happened to us, heavens forbid, I have the number of the cab.

79 DAYS TO GO

I have been so busy doing my website for the past week. I have decided to include a link to my work section wherein you will find poems, stories, etc I did. Most are unedited though. That, I have got no time for. Hahaha...

So I am more or less satisfied with how my website looks. So it may take a while when something new will appear again. Of course, my blog will always be updated, so keep coming back aight!

Hmmm... 79 days to go before I turn 22. I am planning to spend it here in Manila rather than going home in the province. So that also means that I am gonna spend Christmas here, alone, like what i do for the past two years. I ain't really up for meeting old acquaintances from high school. Not just yet. Manila is where my heart is. Haha... What a passe!

And yes, I am really excited about your comments violent reactions suggestions etc. about the new version of this website. Keep those coming aight!

I love you all. Mwah! Hi, H&K. I love you so much!

FEELING GOOD FOR A NIGHT

Argh! Life. It’s Saturday and I can’t even leave the house. As usual, my wallet is way below zero. My brother already discovered I gave him the wrong ATM card after several attempts of wrong pins. Poor me, literally.

Did my laundry yesterday so my chores are already done. I also cleaned my room last night, lit on some scented candle to, obviously, make my room scented. Slept well too. The rain made it easier for me to fall into deep slumber. Woke up around 11AM, made a cup of coffee, bought myself a burger and faced the computer and started doing H&K’s webbie. But I got tired and so I am writing this entry.

Late afternoon yesterday, after the laundry, I went to Starbucks West Avenue and pampered myself with white iced chocolate mocha grande. Also tried to finish a book I have been promising to get done months ago but haven’t, still. Went home around 8PM and watched some TV. I browsed and browsed, like I always do when I don’t know what to do and I stumbled upon Swan, this reality show about making women feel beautiful and confident by performing lots of liposuction and other medical procedures and enhancements, a lot of therapy, physical training, etc. God, did it looked scary. I mean those needles and tubes and stitches! I really hate seeing blood, let alone seeing the insides of the body. Makes my tummy tumble.

So there were two women feeling sorry, plain-jenny, and ugly. They looked so devastated. One caught her husband cheating on her two and a half years during the marriage and only got the courage to divorce him after another one and a half years. But it was obvious she still loves him. On the duration of the transformation, which was three months all in all, she regularly called her ex-husband. The therapist was worried and eventually talked her out of it. Which, fortunately, she did. When the big reveal was on, I was shocked to see how BIG her transformation was. She ain’t just beautiful, physically, with her boobs almost peeking out of her gown, she also had the confidence she lacked before the transformation. And when she saw herself in the mirror after three months, she never stopped screaming. And I was left with my mouth open. I couldn’t wait for the next one to come out and show how her transformation went.

After a short commercial, the host (this beautiful lady, who I think went through the doctor’s needles too) came out. I was back on my seat, attentive. The next woman was revealed. She was perfect. Her story goes way back her childhood. She had this big-boned nose, which her classmates, bullies, ridiculed her for. It just left a big mark on her emotional state that she didn’t have the guts to do whatever she wants, one being a cheerleader. But there came a problem. Moments before the operation, she called her boyfriend hoping she would get support. She didn’t get it. She cried feeling all alone. And I was mad at his boyfriend, who was so not fit for her. She deserves someone better, physically.

So she went through the transformation without the support she was hoping she’d get from his asshole boyfriend. And after three months of intense therapy and going to the gym to gain weight, it was time for her big reveal. When the two, well groomed, guy opened the door, it was like a different, all-new girl came out. She was so beautiful and her smile was so different. It was like she was molded out perfectly, every bit of her body crafted. And her smile was confident. When she got the chance to see herself in the mirror after three months, tears came falling from her eyes and she just can’t stop staring at her reflection.

I was eyeing for her to win that night but the first girl got the prize. Nonetheless, she still was a winner. She got all what she ever wanted. And I think she deserved every stitch of it.

After watching that, I continued surfing and eventually Channel 2 caught my attention. It was showing Till there was you with Judy Ann and Piolo Pascual. I know this is so baduy and jologs but I actually liked the movie. I was instantly flown back in high school when shivers run through your body, when your eyes glow whenever your crush looks your way. It felt great to feel that way again. I wasn’t exactly sure why I got interested in the movie (knowing me, I hate Filipino movies and I’ll never be caught dead watching it in movie houses). Maybe it was the rain pouring outside which set the mood for some loving. And H&K was sending me SMS messages telling me how much he misses me. Argh! I hate to admit that. Just forget about this after you’re done, aight!